This time of year can be extremely high-stress for so many people. The pressure to spend lots of money, get along with everyone, be merry and have a wonderful time can be overwhelming. Expectations get in the way of many of us engaging in appropriate self-care.
This year for many people the holidays are even more anxiety-provoking. Money is not as plentiful for as many people this year and for some people there isn’t even enough to cover the basics.
Here are 5 tips to lower stress (even if only a little) this holiday season.
1. Create realistic expectations.
Sit down and look at how much time you have over the holiday. Look at your financial situation and what is available to spend during the holiday period. Consider your energy level and state of health. Consider the commitments that you cannot change and those you would like to make. Then write out realistic expectations in these areas.
2. Decide on your boundaries (and then set them).
Often during the holiday people feel pressured to see people they don’t wish to see, to attend events that they don’t enjoy attending. Setting boundaries in advance can make everything easier. Choosing to limit the number of events that are stressful will increase peace and joy over the season.
3. Take at least one day just to enjoy whatever you want to enjoy.
Make sure it is an activity that you are not ambivalent about. Make it an activity you love – whether that is watching your favourite holiday movie, playing a round of golf, going for a walk in nature, cuddling with your pets, or having mad passionate sex with a lover. If getting a full day is a problem, take a few hours one day and a couple of hours another day. That day only communicate with and spend time with people who bring you pleasure and joy.
4. Be careful not to overindulge in alcohol, drugs and/or food.
Many families celebrate holiday times with excellent meals and special drinks. There can be a lot of pressure to keep up with others as they imbibe and eat. I am not suggesting not indulging. Just choose not to overindulge. The after-effects of drinking and eating too much are never pleasant and often overshadow the pleasure received from indulging. Your body will cope with all stresses better when balanced. Alcohol, drugs and food do not help to control anxiety (though many people use them to try to control it). The short-term calm gives way to anxiety, anger, sadness or discomfort quickly and that part lasts longer. One way to limit food and alcohol consumption without feeling like you are depriving yourself is to indulge in the best and your favourite alcohol and food.
5. Either put aside your to-do list for the 10 days of the holiday period or set aside an hour a day to work on it, prioritising the most urgent tasks.
If you do work on the list, enjoy crossing things off. It can also be a good time to list everything in your life that is pending. I do an exercise with people to help them get their lists moving again and to reclaim the energy tied up in tasks that never get completed.
For many people, this time of year is really difficult. Some people have trouble with the shorter days and depending upon where in the world you live, a lot less light. Other people find the pressure to see family, be happy, spend a lot of money, eat and drink and be merry overwhelming. If they don’t meet these expectations, it makes them feel worse. Some people are triggered into traumatic past holidays. Being single during this time of year can be hard. Being in an unhappy relationship this time of year can be even worse.
Be kind to yourself. Remember that you can only control yourself and your own reactions and then do the best you can. Take advantage of any support you can access – friends, family and professional support.
Holiday offers:
This year I have a few holiday offers for people who want to start 2023 with a commitment to growth and who have the desire to manifest the relationships that truly work for them.
1. Two-hour laser breakthrough session: This is a session to focus on one issue with a view to resolution. Book here.
Use coupon code Holiday 2022 for ⅓ off.
2. Year-end review. This session includes the exercise mentioned above and some SMART goal-setting. You can book this as an individual here
Two people booking together can book here and save £240. (£120 each)
Four people booking together can book here and save £680 (£170 each)
3. For packages of 10 coaching hours booked by 30 December, 20 % reduction. For packages of 20 hours booked by 30 December, save 25%. To take advantage of this offer email loribeth@drloribethbisbey.com with holiday offer in the subject line.